One question ended most of my arguments

Say this

In a disagreement you can pursue one of two goals. Being right, or finding out. Not both.

Here's how you know which one you're on. Your shoulders go up. Your jaw tightens. You talk faster and over the other person. That's not logic working. That's a person protecting a position.

A manager once cut me off in a meeting and said my plan would never work. I felt all of that. I stopped, breathed, and asked myself one question. Is he right? I wasn't sure. But he had a point, and I said so.

Close

Next argument, when the shoulders go up, ask it silently before you answer. You don't have to concede. You have to actually check. Book link below.